00:00Have you got any sniff?
00:03What, just one cucumber? Just for yourself?
00:06What, are you going to have a cucumber butter?
00:09With mayonnaise? You dirty cow!
00:13I'm just wondering if we can help, my mum's written me a shopping list
00:16and I need to get what's on it, okay?
00:19So, have you got any...
00:22Have you got any back here?
00:24Yeah, it's upstairs behind Tilt.
00:26Right, okay. You've got cucumbers?
00:31What do you mean bigger the better?
00:34What do you mean bigger the better?
00:39That's disgusting, mum.
00:41I've got cucumber at home.
00:43You promised me you've not used it.
00:46No, I'm not getting you a cucumber then.
00:49Have you got any extra...
00:54Extra virgin lube?
00:56I don't know what she's cooking.
00:58Yeah, yeah.
00:58But I don't know what it is.
01:01Have you got any of that?
01:02Yeah, we should do.
01:03Right, just point me to which direction?
01:05Yeah, just want me to show you.
01:06No, just point.
01:07Just in the corner over there.
01:08In the corner, right.
01:09Okay.
01:10Mum, we can't afford champagne.
01:14Because you want universal credit.
01:17Oh my God, I thought that was Ed Sheeran.
01:20No, I thought Ed Sheeran was working in Alda.
01:22Yeah.
01:24No, but it's not.
01:26This is off my mum.
01:27Yeah, yeah.
01:27Okay.
01:29Have you got any fruit shoot hoop loops?
01:33Have you got any of them?
01:34No, I think we've got fruit shoots.
01:36We ain't got no fruit shoot hoop loops.
01:37Right, okay.
01:38And have you got any fart silence off?
01:41No, I don't think we saw that either.
01:43Okay, well I'll go over there then.
01:45Yeah, over there and upstairs.
01:46Okay.
01:49Excuse me.
01:50Hi, have you got any stick prick?
01:53Any stick prick?
01:54Yeah, have you got any stick prick?
01:55Er, maybe on the other aisle over there.
01:58Stick prick, right.
02:00And have you got any...
02:01Have you got a Flock Murray?
02:02A Flock Murray?
02:03Yeah.
02:04No, that's...
02:05Not in this, not in this.
02:06That's for McDonalds.
02:07Wrong store, that.
02:09My mum's asked for these.
02:10Have you got any frozen hamsters?
02:12Frozen hamsters?
02:13I don't know why she wants them.
02:15Hi mum, you okay?
02:16Hi mum.
02:18Right, no.
02:19They're not going to serve me, are they?
02:22Because I'm three, nearly six mum.
02:24They're not, they're not going to give me any of this.
02:28What?
02:30Any what?
02:33No, I'm not buying you that mum.
02:35I'm in the right area but I'm not getting you that.
02:38Because mum, you...
02:41That's...
02:41That's for ladies business.
02:45No, because you...
02:47You put that in there.
02:49No, I'm not doing that.
02:51Er...
02:52No, I don't.
02:53Have you...
02:53Have you got an extra large hammer?
02:56An extra large what?
02:57I have an extra large hammer.
02:59Sell me Uncle Barry.
03:01I don't want to use it on him.
03:03Well, he does.
03:03He just wants to put a painting up, that's it.
03:06Erm...
03:07Have you got any rubble bap?
03:12I don't think we've got any rubble bap.
03:14Have you got any red pale knowledge?
03:16Red pale knowledge?
03:18Red pale knowledge?
03:19Have you got any of them?
03:21I don't think we do.
03:22Right.
03:22We've got some blue pale knowledge somewhere.
03:24Have you got blue pale knowledge, right?
03:26But you've got stick prick on the other side.
03:29Right.
03:30Thank you very much.
03:31I'll go and get it.
03:32Alright.
03:36No way.
03:37This is the only shop where you can get...
03:39A mix of different peppers, cherries and a rugby ball.
03:43Magic.
03:45Two tomatoes and a cucumber.
03:48Mum, do you have any idea what that sounds like?
03:51OK, Mum, I'm going.
03:53A lady here wants to get my picture.
03:57No, not for employee of the month.
03:59I'm just saying she wants my picture.
04:01Excuse me.
04:02Oh, mate.
04:03Not again.
04:04Oh, God.
04:04Oh, please.
04:05Please.
04:06Right.
04:06Listen.
04:07Listen.
04:08I've got another list.
04:09Right.
04:10This is my shop where...
04:16I'm so sorry.
04:24Right.
04:24Right.
04:25Right.
04:25Shut up.
04:26Sorry.
04:52No.
04:54Right.
04:55Right.
04:55Right.
04:55Sorry.
04:57I'm actually crying.
04:59Well, this is for Uncle Barry, right?
05:01Yeah.
05:02Have you got any sniff?
05:14No.
05:16Wait.
05:18Have you not got any sniff?
05:19No.
05:19Right.
05:20OK.
05:21Have you got any Viagra?
05:25No.
05:25Not here either.
05:27OK.
05:27Have you got any plant pots?
05:29We'll do upstairs by flowers.
05:30You've got plant pots upstairs with flowers.
05:32OK.
05:33That's disgusting.
05:35Right.
05:35Tell Uncle Barry that they've got Stella in here.
05:38He calls that wife Peter.
05:40He does.
05:42They've not got Haribo in here.
05:44Oh God's sake.
05:46Em.
05:46Scratch cards.
05:48Yep.
05:48I don't think you'll be able to buy one of them though mate.
05:50Why not?
05:51I don't think you'll be old enough.
05:52Shut your mouth.
05:53Em.
05:54Six pack of Stella.
05:55Huh?
05:56Yeah.
05:57Yep.
05:57Got a six pack of Stella.
05:59Em.
06:04Right.
06:05I need.
06:07I need.
06:08Wipes.
06:09And then he's crossed something out.
06:11Something.
06:14Something come.
06:15Em.
06:16Wipes for.
06:17Right.
06:17Wipes for my mum.
06:19Wipes for your mum?
06:20Yeah.
06:20Yeah.
06:21Just the Hermes.
06:22Right.
06:22Get them.
06:23OK.
06:25And have you got any fruit shoot hoop loops?
06:29I don't think we sell them mate.
06:31Right.
06:31Still not got any fruit shoot hoop loops.
06:33Right.
06:34Well.
06:35I'm gonna.
06:35I'll get.
06:36I'll get the wipes.
06:37And then.
06:37And then.
06:38I may see you again soon.
06:40If you want your sniffer.
06:40Go to Piccadilly.
06:41You might be alright.
06:44OK.
06:45See you.
06:46Bye.
06:48Do you want some sugar?
06:49Do you want some bread?
06:51What do you need?
06:52Yeah.
06:53They've got bread here.
06:55Yeah.
06:55Do you want some bread?
06:57No.
06:57No.
06:58So what are you going to use your cucumber for then?
07:01They're not going to serve me with champagne mum.
07:04They're not going to do that.
07:07No they've got juice.
07:09I've got loads of juice.
07:13No they don't do fruit shoot in here.
07:16Everything's fake.
07:18Bye mum.
07:19I'll see you in a bit.
07:19I love you.
07:21I love you.
07:21Love you.
07:21Bye.
07:22Bye mum.
07:24I don't know what you're doing.
07:29It's actually me.
07:30Can I take a picture of you?
07:31Of course you can.
07:32Hi.
07:33Are you okay?
07:37Come here.
07:38Get a picture then.
07:39Say cheese.
07:44You're welcome.
07:45You're welcome.
07:46See you in a bit.
07:47Love you.
07:48Oh.
07:48One more.
07:50Cheese.
07:52Welcome.
07:54See you in a bit lad.
07:56Sorry.
07:57I've not got anything.
07:59Well this has been a waste of my time hasn't it?
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