- 36 minutes ago
Superboy vs. Alien
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:12let go of the president hand over the nuclear codes or I stick this down your
00:19who's hungry for some fried calamari
00:26it's commander z leader of the zenrith league
00:33sup how's your grandpa doing amelia the last time i saved him
00:37shoot him
00:59let's get this over with i have a thing later
01:30don't worry buddy i know a really good taylor
01:39you've done it again commander z it took the fbi five years fighting these alien terrorists
01:45but it only took you five months undercover to find them and just five minutes to take
01:51him out told you i have a thing later sir please let me honor you with a public announcement
01:56whoa sir with all due respect
02:00i just want to live my life
02:17as a normal high school senior
02:21sir your tux
02:24fuck i'm gonna be late for our date ivy's gonna be real mad and your flowers
02:32thanks alphonse but i'm gonna need more than this help me get her a good apology present
02:37something fancy okay
02:39another gift but you just secretly got her into zenith league
02:49whoa watch it hey i know you like what you're seeing but maybe buy the lady a drink first
03:00wait your cat girl kimmy newly melted rank s superhero man i know you fanboys want my autograph
03:09sorry to disappoint but i have a girlfriend already she's the only superhero for me oh good because i don't
03:15have time to chit chat with nerds you can run along to your girlfriend while i go save the president
03:19don't sweat it i i already took care of the alien
03:22wait took care of the alien you name zeno
03:29that's the next wave of enemies wait i should tell you there's only one way to kill them
03:33who do you think i am i'm cat girl birds natural predator not those guys
03:36their feathered coats are made of a special metal it's impenetrable go for the inside of their beaks
03:41and how would you know what whatever who is he to tell me how to fight
03:53phew made it right on time
03:58why is there a party here ivy hey anyone seen ivy
04:06ivy i brought you flowers for our dating anniversary and
04:10i'm glad you made it zeno this is my breakup party because i'm dumping you
04:16breaking up we just hit our two you missed the entire half of the school year
04:20i know you're bland and you blend in hang on i'm bland what you've been mixing sriracha with
04:26bees in your drink or something but you're utterly for forgettable now and that's embarrassing me
04:32seriously simps are supposed to try extra hard for your attention he doesn't even try guess he's a
04:38failure at that too excuse me though i'm enjoying the sweet talk this is between me and my girlfriend
04:44stop pretending like you can even protect me or have anything to offer zeno and how would you know
04:50that because i'm gonna be the new face of zenith league i was just recruited by the number one
04:57superhero league in the world as for you class rankings came out already haven't you seen them
05:04you missed so much of mercenary school you missed all the trials to get into the superhero leagues
05:09your lowest of the lows rank z and you know zenith league only takes rank a's and above i can't
05:16be seen
05:16with you like this they're asking me commander z of the entire league to try out for my own team
05:29you don't understand would king kong go to school just to prove he can squash a tiny little bug
05:34i thought so look closely i only score so low so that you ivy don't have to feel so bad
05:41about coming
05:42in last place i didn't ask you to do those things quit trying to guilt trip me i bet even
05:48if your
05:48parents were alive they'd ditch you for a more gifted son too
06:03i kill you just for fun but why waste time on a maggot like you i won't let you get
06:09away with it
06:15that was the day i unlocked my powers and that was when i promised to never let another child go
06:20through the same hell i did my parents died protecting this world don't sell their memories
06:27or what and too bad you didn't inherit your parents super genes otherwise you wouldn't be such a loser
06:33whatever xenon you can stay at the bottom because i've upgraded for someone better someone who can
06:39actually take me to high places hey what's up nerd
06:54you cheated on me ivy brad has super strength in his rank a zenith league just accepted him
07:02he's my real hero oh my gosh his superhero name is the boulder how cool is that
07:08and you're just a powerless weakling born to be a loser ah baby i'm so sore from benching 500 today
07:14oh i'll massage them for you looks like i gained another power invisibility ivy doesn't have to give
07:20a damn about you because guess what zenith league is starting an all-girl special team and ivy is going
07:26to be on it that's right it's led by the drop dead gorgeous cat girl kimi and i'm the newest
07:32member oh i'm so
07:33excited why aren't you applauding you should be happy i'm making you famous for being my ex-boyfriend
07:40that's because i was the one who got you man
07:49that xeno guy was right about birdman's weakness
07:52i could have died if it weren't for his intel
07:55whoever he is i must find him
08:00you got me into zenith league oh it's almost cute his vocab is so limited he doesn't even
08:07know the meaning of zenith league i'm commander z the creator and literal definition of zenith league
08:13yeah even i know zenith means top of the top
08:16what are those glasses for anyways keep your mediocrity away from me
08:21don't be an idiot xeno you don't even have powers i only got into zenith league all thanks to brad
08:28his dad is the headhunter i see how it is your lame excuses aren't doing a very good job covering
08:33up
08:33your greed and to think i was going to take you to the top with me not anymore i know
08:37you're sensitive
08:38and i broke your fragile little heart but let's face it there's no future with you that's because
08:43you're too busy plummeting to the ground too bad this glorified piece of rock isn't going to save
08:48you from the oncoming regret when you realize that your upgrade is a downgrade i'll show you who's a
08:56downgrade
09:11i made a promise to my parents that i was only going to use my powers for good
09:14not petty fights
09:22nobody's ever deflected my punch before much less catch it how did he oh he's so big and strong
09:29they don't call brad the boulder for nothing you fools are made for each other zeno
09:34even being invisible would do you more good than having no powers
09:38i'm sorry for you you can save the pity for yourself you know what this guy's ruined the whole
09:43party i've got a bigger bachelor pod let's head over there here's a lesson before i leave you in
09:47the dust zeno love is for fairy tales even i know that a loser so that's what my first girlfriend
09:56thinks of me huh well joke's on her
10:15that's thanks for helping me take down the enemy oh you mean the pigeon guys thought you said you had
10:22them in the bag miss rank s
10:26i didn't a good cat admits when she's met her better half guess you're not just some nerd you'd
10:31be an asset to zeneryth league how about you become our battle tactician is that an invite
10:38to my own superhero league it is tomorrow's the first day training for new recruits your ex-girlfriend
10:45will be there too i can tell everyone you're my boyfriend help you get back at her i went from
10:50tactician to boyfriend in less than five seconds that's a little fast i have to think about it
10:55i live life on the edge bottoms up boo this is a good chance to see what my team is
11:00actually like
11:01i'll stay undercover for this
11:06first training day is like frat rush you'll have to go through a gauntlet of opponents but i bet you'll
11:12have plenty of pointers for our heroes if they're actually any good then they won't need my help oh
11:16you'll be surprised you go in there first i'm going to change i'll be back in a moment to introduce
11:20you
11:28first training day i'm ready to shoot up some new recruits
11:33again you nearly killed everyone in our last batch and a bunch of villagers too
11:36maybe save some fun for me this time huh what the hell i created zenith league so the world's best
11:42superheroes can fight crime and evil together not torment civilians
11:50oh my gosh
11:52zenith league even upgraded my weapon for me personally delivered by cat girl kiwi sidekick too
11:57and it's all thanks to you for recommending me brad
12:06what's up towel boy
12:11wait what good dodge kid maybe one day you can be like us
12:17now go wash my dirty laundry they think i'm just a towel boy
12:21this ought to be fun brad i want a rematch for that arm wrestling the other day
12:25oh yeah you want to get whooped again this what you superheroes do all day getting off on measuring
12:34guns and stroking your eagles
12:38xeno what the hell are you doing here this is only for zenith league superheroes and recruits
12:43your technique's all wrong you got to engage your toes oh and never underestimate pinky power
12:49who's this weak looking twig ignore him he's just a powerless loser from mercenary school came in
12:53dead last in class zero powers i can't believe it brad he's so desperate he's stalking me now
12:59that's so creepy ivy aren't you just a new recruit don't talk like you own the place
13:04or i may have to humble you you beat us dude did i hit you too hard on the head
13:10last time you
13:11fucking lost it you're like a helpless puppy on the streets begging for attention you're the one
13:18who's all bark and no bite this isn't a challenge for me because beating you guys would be like
13:22squashing ant that's it four eyes you can only read about how to fight in a textbook but i've got
13:28real
13:28combat experience so let me show you what makes me a real man or maybe i'll teach you a lesson
13:39in
13:42humility give up xenon i know you're desperate to get me back but you have no powers you're not
13:46even good enough to be the towel boy i told you i'm not interested in your petty little games come
13:49on loser you don't even want to fight back after your girl chose me what you scared of course he's
13:54scared brad everyone knows you've got super strength and you're the strongest of our class you're
13:57gonna break his arm in less than a second you keep underestimating me ivy but you're gonna regret it
14:02her only regret is not dumping your nerdy ass earlier now put your arm up and if you don't trigger
14:07happy we'll show you a real good time games and powers that's all they care about instead of
14:12helping those in need i really should clean house go on arm up dipshit better use that pinky power you
14:19were talking about if you want to live
14:25three two one go
14:36if you're rank a then what am i
14:42what the hell was that you look scared i thought you were the bolder
14:47not very bold are you i told you your stance was all wrong nobody has ever beat brad before
14:55this this is impossible what kind of trickery did you pull on me spill it i'd never lose
15:02i won fair and swear bro who's the sore loser now
15:12enough no more of this xenon i know i broke your fragile little heart when i dumped you but this
15:16is no place for your circus act yeah your loser ex-boyfriend just wants to humiliate you in front
15:22of all the heroes at zenith league do you even know what this place is xenon this is the danger
15:27room
15:27the ultimate training arena for zenith league designed by cat girl kimi herself is the only
15:34rank s female fighter in the league nobody dares to mess with her well i didn't need those glasses
15:38anyways depressed this whip is the very proof that i belong here yeah your aim really has improved with
15:43that new whip zenith league upgraded it with material that can even burn through an iron wall before you
15:47couldn't even hit an elephant if it was two feet in front of you stop talking down to me i'm
15:51a
15:51somebody now and you're a nobody what are you gonna do actually whip me i'm not your boyfriend
15:55anymore or are you begging me back now that's it i'm getting rid of you once and for all
16:09he caught my whip
16:13this whip is injected with venom too how is he still okay you said you got this whip because cat
16:18girl
16:18kimi recruited you to be on her girl power squad yes and you better watch it you can fish in
16:24this
16:24if you mess with me that's messing with cat girl kimi you're an idiot xeno and i thought you were
16:32at
16:32least book smart all of us here are rank a heroes we can pummel you to mush if we wanted
16:36to but now
16:37you're straight up tempting death cat girl kimi skinned her last opponent birdman alive you know that oh yes i
16:43heard she told me the whole thing you see kimiko was the one who invited me today are you kidding
16:47me
16:48cat girl kimiko is a rank-ass hero she would never be caught with a powerless weaker like you
16:52oof they say only sticks and stones can hurt me actually nothing can
16:57it's time i take back everything i ever gave you and put you in your place
17:11so are we just gonna stand around and talk or are we gonna fight
17:22what was that xeon you'll pay for this brad do something
17:29this all you got all i feel is a light breeze you don't want to play with hellfire
17:38you just look like an ape drenched in kerosene get a grip
17:47he's getting me trigger happy let's hit him all at once
17:50he's getting me trigger happy let's hit him all at once
17:55i want his head
17:57charges
17:58no
17:59no
18:00no
18:01no
18:02no
18:04no
18:04no
18:06no
18:07no
18:10no
18:20you just kissed him do you know who that is that's my that's just some nobody from mercenary
18:28school yep my new battle tactician and he's got better moves than everyone in this room
18:33combined
18:35he has zero rank he's not even a recruit he's a towel boy he beat your arm in under a
18:41second
18:42anyone else want to debate his qualifications you could have just shaken my hand where's the fun in
18:48that my office five minutes
18:54do something oh i'm gonna do something
19:01tonight
19:02there's a data heist at the federal tech vault downtown
19:05someone's going after zenith league's classified files
19:09how classified identity level real names home addresses every active hero in the league including
19:16mine you'll come as tech support stay in comms range and call the shots from the outside
19:22boomerang and i go in what do we know about the crew hitting the vault
19:30that's why you're here
19:30goes by vortex new
19:32nobody's faced him yet and walked away with their power intact
19:35he drains supers on contact one touch gone everything one touch
19:42so he can only drain one person at a time
19:45yes
19:47then don't let him get his hands on both of you at once
19:50you keep him splitting his attention
19:52he can't drain what he can't catch
19:55see that's why you're here
20:00meet me at the van in an hour
20:02try not to look too smart it's distracting
20:07i built this league to protect people
20:09if vortex gets those files every hero i trained is a walking target
20:16we're in server rooms two floors down three heat signatures ahead of you
20:20vortex is the one hanging back he'll let his crew engage first he waits until you're distracted
20:24look at that he strategizes
20:38boomerang left
20:46now
20:50i can't feel it my power's gone
20:54stay down cat girl rank s i've been looking forward to this
21:01keep him reaching left and keep me
21:03don't let him back you into a corner he's counting on that
21:11who's in your ear
21:26interesting nothing to drain or is there something you're hiding
21:38this isn't over not even close
21:45he felt something that's a problem
21:50boomerang's power will return fully in 48 hours the download was stopped mission's a win
21:54a win boomerang got drained nobody's ever taken her down before she'd be completely powerless right
22:00now if kimi hadn't split his attention he can only drain one target at a time that's his limit
22:04that's how you beat him he also grabbed our tactics outside the van tried to drain him nothing
22:09happened why rank z remember nothing to drain
22:13i want a full background sweep on this guy school records family history the works something doesn't
22:19add up i trust him that's enough you've known him for two days kimi he's got no rank no powers
22:26and
22:26vortex walked right up to his van like he knew exactly who he was looking for meeting's over
22:35xenon yeah you noticed his drain pattern before we even got inside
22:39i study people it's what i do and when his hand was on your wrist you didn't flinch you didn't
22:46panic
22:47you were waiting to see what he'd do xeno is there something you want to tell me
23:03zenith league i have a simple request commander z steps forward and reveals his true identity
23:11publicly in the city square you have until dawn or i drain every rank a hero in this city simultaneously
23:17every single one
23:21can he actually do that we don't know what his upper limit is does anyone here know who commander z
23:28is
23:32commander z has always operated independently his identity is classified even from us
23:38so what do we do we can't just let vortex drain all of us some of us don't have anything
23:43to worry about
23:44rank z's got no power to drain right xenon right lucky you
24:01that's what's going on
24:04nobody bombs every single test
24:09not this consistently not unless they're trying to
24:21no way
24:31oh oh that's why
24:34the
24:38the
24:40the
24:40the
24:42the
25:05He's not waiting for Dawn.
25:07Everyone, full gear, now!
25:17Zeno, get me a plan.
25:20If I go out there as Commander Z, everything I built gets blown open.
25:26Everyone I've kept safe, my team, my cover, my life, gone.
25:33But if I don't...
25:34I can feel it! He's pulling! From here!
25:39Zeno, I need a plan, now!
25:42Commander Z, sir, you have to go now. If he completes the drain...
25:47I know, Alphonse.
26:02I know who Commander Z is.
26:22Don't move!
26:23No!
26:24You're living in service and you're living in space.
26:26A
26:26You
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