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Short filmTranscript
00:00:02Healer goddess, hear my plea.
00:00:06Please save my kind.
00:00:23Rod of a sepulis.
00:00:30Rod of a sepulis.
00:00:43Rejuvening.
00:00:51Praise! She is the healer goddess!
00:00:55No, please. Don't call me that.
00:00:59I'm just glad I could help.
00:01:05Here you go, miss.
00:01:09Why be weighed down by a throne when I can live amongst the common people and help those the most
00:01:13in need?
00:01:26You must be rushing off to go find your jewels, because only a sackless coward would hit a puppy and
00:01:32run!
00:01:35Aw, it's okay, little guy. I'll fix you right up.
00:01:44Right rewrites the wrong.
00:01:49Rejuvening.
00:01:54See? Good as the day you can kick him out of your mother's womb.
00:02:00Come on, Cleo. Let's go!
00:02:11Hey, hey, hey!
00:02:17Please. My brother's been in a coma the last two years. We have no idea what the illness is.
00:02:23If anyone can help cure him, we will pay you handsomely.
00:02:26Be Lysander Armstrong!
00:02:28His military family basically owns the entire global stock market!
00:02:32He's so hot!
00:02:34Does he come with the money?
00:02:35Yes. He'll even marry you if you can cure him.
00:02:38Money. Fame. Power.
00:02:40It's all yours.
00:02:46Are we still moving forward, Miss Trixie?
00:02:48Yes. Give the presidential contract to Marissa.
00:02:52Oh, I have another call coming in.
00:02:56Grandma!
00:02:56I'm dying! Save me, Trixie!
00:03:00Grandma?
00:03:02Grandma.
00:03:03When are you getting married? I'm already a hundred years old.
00:03:07I'm gonna keep you healthy forever, Grandma.
00:03:09And Butch is still on deployment, so that's why I haven't been married yet.
00:03:16Oh, but why marry a vegetable when I can bang a younger stud like you?
00:03:23We're talking about my brother's life. I don't have time for jokes.
00:03:27Oh, no!
00:03:36Please go feed your dog, Miss. Don't let it starve like you.
00:03:40Oh, kind stranger. Let me repay you by granting you a wish.
00:03:44Grant me a wish? That you can barely feed yourself?
00:03:47The downfall of humanity. It all starts with the loss of faith.
00:03:51What?
00:03:52What? Oh, jeez, this is giving me a migraine now.
00:03:55Are you telling me to pray to God because we've been doing that?
00:03:58I'm telling you to have some faith in me.
00:04:02Okay, uh, I wish for you to cure my brother's illness.
00:04:06Can you do that?
00:04:07I can topple mountains and make a king out of a frog if I wanted to.
00:04:12Cleo, stay right here for a second.
00:04:13Don't go too far, Cleo.
00:04:18Hold still.
00:04:26My migraine's gone.
00:04:28Okay, then let's go.
00:04:29If you can cure my brother, he'll even marry you.
00:04:32Come on. Come on.
00:04:47How is he?
00:04:49What is the diagnosis?
00:04:50Remember, you will not marry him unless you cure him.
00:04:53I'm sorry. I don't know what this is.
00:04:56Aren't you the queen of medicine?
00:04:57You're supposed to be one of the best.
00:04:59Don't worry, General.
00:05:00I'm the angel herbalist and I have mastered all healing methods of the East.
00:05:05I can detect what condition your son has with just one needle.
00:05:26I have no clue what this is.
00:05:30Oh, it looks like the angel herbalist doesn't live up to her name after all.
00:05:35That's why we saved the best for last.
00:05:38Me, the witch doctor.
00:05:40I'll save your son, Lysander.
00:05:52He's not budging. There's no movement.
00:05:54Truly, I have saved thousands of patients all over the world, but I don't know what this is.
00:06:01Lord, I've scoured the earth for the best doctors. They've tried all these methods and they've all failed.
00:06:07If we can't save him, there's only one person who can.
00:06:12Who?
00:06:16The goddess of healing.
00:06:19Wait a second. You're not talking about the legendary goddess healing.
00:06:23That's correct. Her right rewrites the wrong and her left leaves the bereft.
00:06:30That's her motto.
00:06:31It's what makes her a sage amongst mortals. We are nothing compared to her.
00:06:36She is eccentric and elusive. No one has ever seen her before.
00:06:41If this legendary healer is the only one that can truly save my son, I don't care if I go
00:06:47bankrupt.
00:06:48I will find her. James, come.
00:06:51Put out a bounty.
00:06:53To the entire world.
00:06:54Whoever finds the goddess healer will give her five million dollars.
00:06:59There's no need.
00:07:14I'll save your son.
00:07:17Who the hell is she?
00:07:18Dad, she says she can cure Lysander.
00:07:20She's gonna save your brother? Don't be ridiculous.
00:07:24How can this shit-stained hobo cure your brother?
00:07:27Exactly.
00:07:28Holy God, the unemployed are getting crazier and crazier.
00:07:31She's trying to scam her way into marrying the rich.
00:07:34Ew! She even brought a filthy dog with her.
00:07:38I bet it has fleas.
00:07:40That flea-infested dirty thing is your companion.
00:07:44Don't try to steal Lysander Armstrong from us.
00:07:51Don't touch him.
00:07:54They say don't judge a book by its cover.
00:07:56But I can see from all your faces that you've failed.
00:07:59So step aside.
00:08:01I'll take it from here.
00:08:03Could you hold this?
00:08:04Ho, ho, ho, ho.
00:08:05You're not gonna touch my son.
00:08:07I'm the richest tycoon in this country and a former general.
00:08:12I know a gold-digging whore when I see one.
00:08:14I bet she's only here because giving blowjobs on the street corners wasn't paying enough cash.
00:08:20Who knows what an unskilled whore girl like her would do for some.
00:08:24A skinny-ass beggar trying to take advantage of Lysander Armstrong when he's unconscious?
00:08:30Ew! Disgusting.
00:08:33Go back to being a prostitute.
00:08:35Security! Get this STD-infested peasant out of here now. Let's go.
00:08:39If you throw me out, you're tossing away your son's last chance at life.
00:08:47Sir, we are at our wit's end trying to find a cure for Master Lysander and to no avail.
00:08:52Maybe we should give her a try?
00:08:55You can always deal with her later if she turns out to be a fraud.
00:08:58All right, I'll give you a shot.
00:09:01But I warn you, if you fail, I'll have your and your dog's head mounted on my wall.
00:09:07Is that any way to ask for help?
00:09:10You'd be blessed to have me.
00:09:12And I'm only here to repay your younger son's kindness.
00:09:15But since I'm not welcome here, I'll leave.
00:09:20Seven, come find me when you have a different wish.
00:09:23No, Miss Trixie, my brother is a hero to me. I can't lose him.
00:09:29Well, if he's a hero to you, then that means he must be a good person.
00:09:34My brother is a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
00:09:39Also, he's great with puppies. He'd make a great husband.
00:09:44Who says I want to marry him?
00:09:45As if the number one hottest 30 under 30 would even dream of marrying a penniless bum like you.
00:09:52Only a lunatic would be crazy enough to marry her.
00:09:55I mean, look at her. Even if she cleaned herself up.
00:09:58You couldn't find an ounce of femininity on her.
00:10:02Only those cut from the lowest ranks were bigger over such trivial matters.
00:10:06Continue wasting your time.
00:10:08But I'm saving this patient.
00:10:20You're okay.
00:10:22What?
00:10:22What's happening?
00:10:24What are we doing?
00:10:35What the hell are you doing?
00:10:39I knew she was a perv!
00:10:41She's definitely trying to steal Lysander from us.
00:10:44Do you all not know that sweat can tell you everything that's medically wrong with a patient?
00:10:47Are you insane? Security, smash her face in for licking my son.
00:10:53He's born with congenital heart disease, has a peanut allergy, and the condition he has is called endogenic cryomorphy.
00:11:00Yeah, right. I mean, no way you got all that just from licking him.
00:11:04Oh, okay. I've studied every disease known to man, right?
00:11:07I even have the badge of universal medicine right here.
00:11:11And I've never heard of endo-cryo-what-what?
00:11:18This?
00:11:25Is worth nothing when I have the real thing right here.
00:11:28What?
00:11:29What? So you think that this crummy walking stick of yours is, what, the rod of a sepulius?
00:11:36Why don't you go back to the homeless asylum where you came from if you're going to be this delusional?
00:11:41I agree. I mean, even if she does solve this medical mystery, what is the point as of doctors who
00:11:47have studied for years?
00:11:49We are all certified.
00:11:51But Lysander does have congenital heart disease.
00:11:54She's right about everything.
00:11:58Yeah, but if she just throws out a bunch of fake diagnoses, one of them is bound to be right.
00:12:03And again, there is no such thing as endo-cryo-what-what?
00:12:07Endogenic cryomorphy.
00:12:08Oh.
00:12:09And of course none of you have heard of it.
00:12:11Because I just discovered it.
00:12:13This condition only affects those with both CHD and a peanut allergy.
00:12:17The chances are a billion to one. A hundred times rarer than winning the lottery.
00:12:22But lucky for you all, you've hit the jackpot by finding me.
00:12:27What a bunch of baloney.
00:12:28I mean, you wouldn't be homeless if you were actually any good.
00:12:33Precisely. You are just a scamming prostitute.
00:12:36You don't compare to meet us who actually studied real medicine.
00:12:41I bet you were too poor to go to real medical school.
00:12:45Oh, so she went to the super circus instead.
00:12:49And now she's here putting on this clown show coming up with fake diseases, which mean nothing if you can't
00:12:56wake him up.
00:12:57Is that supposed to be a challenge?
00:12:59Oh, yeah.
00:13:01If you three incompetent doormats want to show me up, I think you all should grow parts of your brain
00:13:07back.
00:13:07Which, by the way, that condition is called an encephaly.
00:13:12What is that supposed to mean?
00:13:13It means you're being schooled by me and I'm about to walk all over your medical licensees.
00:13:19Then let's have a bet.
00:13:21If you can't heal him, we'll break your hands.
00:13:26And then you can't pretend to have healing hands anymore.
00:13:33These hands have saved more lives than all three of you combined.
00:13:37You're that desperate to get rid of your competition, huh?
00:13:40Miss Trixie, don't risk your hands for them.
00:13:43There's too many lives at stake.
00:13:47Don't worry. I got this.
00:13:52It's a deal.
00:13:54I'll save Lysander Armstrong.
00:13:56No one is dying on my watch.
00:14:04Lysander Armstrong has been in a vegetative state for two years.
00:14:11Are you stopping me because you're scared I'd actually succeed?
00:14:15Homeless or not, if you save my son, I'll give you everything.
00:14:27I'll even have Lysander, my heir, marry you.
00:14:30I'm not doing this for the money or for a wealthy husband.
00:14:33I just believe in helping good people and doing the right thing.
00:14:38Prepare a jacuzzi set at exactly 113 degrees Fahrenheit.
00:14:41Wait, wait, wait, wait. What for?
00:14:43Don't listen to her.
00:14:45She probably stinks so bad that she just wants a bath to wash the homeless stench off of her.
00:14:50Firstly, this is called greatness.
00:14:54Secondly, even if you drown yourself in plastic surgery, you couldn't get rid of your own ugly moral character.
00:15:01What? Did you just call me?
00:15:05There's a man's life at stake here, and you're standing in my way.
00:15:10Don't don the mantle of doctor when you're only capable of harm.
00:15:14Now stop getting in my way, or I promise you, you will be bubbling at the mouth very soon.
00:15:20Oh, yeah?
00:15:21Hey, you wanna see real pain?
00:15:22Where's the dog?
00:15:23Well, put down the dog!
00:15:25With pleasure.
00:15:35Oh!
00:15:41Left.
00:15:42Leave the wrong breath.
00:15:47You don't deserve to call yourself a doctor.
00:15:53She's been poisoned!
00:15:56It was her!
00:15:57Do you see any poison on me?
00:16:00Medicine in the right hands can save lives, but in the wrong hands, it becomes nothing but poison.
00:16:06This bitch isn't good enough to take down the queen of medicine!
00:16:09Do you have one of your antidotes on you?
00:16:11Of course.
00:16:13I've saved entire civilizations with my antidotes.
00:16:16If I want to save someone, even the Grim Reaper can't stop me.
00:16:36Why is she spitting blood?
00:16:37This wasn't supposed to happen!
00:16:39I thought you said even the Grim Reaper can't get in your way.
00:16:42Angel herbalist.
00:16:43This is what I call...
00:16:46Malpractice.
00:16:48This isn't fatal.
00:16:49She'll live.
00:16:50But she deserves a little punishment.
00:16:52Well, where's the jacuzzi I asked for?
00:16:54Jacuzzi is ready?
00:16:55Right this way.
00:16:57Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:16:58What the hell is going on?
00:16:59You say you want your son to live on to give you tons of grandchildren, don't you?
00:17:04Then stop getting in my way.
00:17:05Every second counts.
00:17:08Let's go for our dip, shall we?
00:17:14General Armstrong, your family is the richest and most powerful in the nation.
00:17:19Are you really gonna let this hobo slut touch your son?
00:17:23Hold on.
00:17:24You two are going in there... alone?
00:17:27If you don't want these drooling vultures to see your son naked, then sure, invite everyone in.
00:17:33All right.
00:17:34But I warn you.
00:17:36No funny business.
00:17:57You are too old.
00:17:59Alright, I'll tell you.
00:18:03Thanks.
00:18:04You are too old.
00:18:07I'll tell you.
00:18:07It's fine.
00:18:39You really shouldn't leave your precious son in there with that homeless conwoman, General Armstrong.
00:18:44Exactly.
00:18:44What if she gets pregnant by him?
00:18:47She could blackmail you for millions.
00:18:50That's what I would do if I was that poor.
00:18:52And then the Armstrong family will be the laughingstock of the nation, held for ransom by a homeless woman.
00:18:59Dad, you can't seriously be listening to that.
00:19:02We have to have faith.
00:19:04Where did you actually find the slow light?
00:19:07Uh, on the streets.
00:19:11Are you shitting me?
00:19:13You found this bum on the streets?
00:19:15Are you nuts?
00:19:16You don't know her.
00:19:17You don't know her background.
00:19:18She could be a psychotic murderer.
00:19:20That is it, General.
00:19:21You have to go in and stop this now.
00:19:23You're right.
00:19:23That's it.
00:19:24I'm shutting down this clown show right now.
00:19:26James, let's go.
00:19:27Yes, sir.
00:19:38I told you all to stay out.
00:19:46This is a critical moment for you.
00:19:48We can't be interrupted.
00:19:49Otherwise, we'd both die.
00:19:55I'm not going to let this homeless hoochie mama trap my son.
00:20:00I'm going to save him myself.
00:20:03No, thank you.
00:20:07You see that, General?
00:20:08This isn't just a gull-dicking con woman.
00:20:11This is witchcraft.
00:20:13I know what this is.
00:20:15This is the dark witch.
00:20:17I've heard of her.
00:20:18She uses her dark magic to steal the hearts of young, handsome men, and then she eats them alive.
00:20:24I'm going to kill that bitch before she takes my son.
00:20:28James, get the SWAT team.
00:20:30Yes, sir.
00:20:34You're regained consciousness.
00:20:46Help me.
00:20:47I'm just one.
00:20:52Something's wrong.
00:20:56You were drunk with an aphrodisiac.
00:20:59Lysander Armstrong.
00:21:00And his fortune will soon be mine.
00:21:04That's one more thing I'm saving you from.
00:21:13Sir?
00:21:14The SWAT team is here.
00:21:16Captain Morales.
00:21:19My son is trapped behind there with a devious, man-eating witch.
00:21:24I need you to do whatever you can to tear down that door.
00:21:27Rest assured, General Armstrong.
00:21:29We'll break down that door and bury that bitch alive.
00:21:36He's dead.
00:21:38Right.
00:21:38Rewrites the wrong.
00:21:42Human.
00:21:46Who the fuck are you?
00:21:48And why the hell am I naked?
00:21:51Good.
00:21:52You're awake.
00:21:53I'm saving you.
00:21:54Saving me by bathing with me who are your fucking spy
00:22:01Talk I swear to God will have you arrested for this
00:22:05You're the one who's trying to kiss me in your stippor. I
00:22:10Will never oh
00:22:25Look who's guilty now
00:22:29Look, I don't know what the fuck this is all right, but it is a biological fact a man is
00:22:35attracted to a
00:22:37Naked woman and her breasts science. Okay. It just means that my body. Oh shut up
00:22:45You just talked to me with your funny and I'm a professional I hear Lysander's voice captain do something now
00:22:52ready
00:22:58Oh
00:22:59We're almost there a
00:23:03Get him boys get
00:23:06Bye
00:23:10Bye
00:23:25Those the missiles
00:23:27How is this possible it's it's not even a scratch. I told you this is dark magic
00:23:33Of course your earthly bullets won't do a thing. No, I believe miss Trixie is a good person
00:23:39She's not the dark witch young master Armstrong. You are too easily fooled this homeless psycho
00:23:46Doesn't even have the skills to make a living. How is she going to save someone else's life?
00:23:50That's right the queen angel and I are already the top female doctors in the world if we can't save
00:23:56him
00:23:57No one can except for the goddess healer think about it. We heard Lysander's voice
00:24:02He's been in a coma for two years. Miss Trixie must have woken him up. You're right this
00:24:07homeless girls maybe the goddess
00:24:12Maybe this homeless girl is really the god
00:24:15No, no
00:24:16Absolutely not there is no way this hobo girl is better than us
00:24:21How could you know for sure right now what we need to do is not interrupt miss Trixie you're wrong,
00:24:27sir
00:24:27This homeless snake is using the forbidden techniques on master Lysander. It's called borderline revival
00:24:34She uses torturous pain to wake the patient
00:24:38But only temporarily it's a trick to pull the wool over your eyes and ears
00:24:44That means my son is in tremendous pain
00:24:47I'm gonna ask you two to do whatever you can
00:24:49To kill that antler rod bearing witch my son doesn't deserve this
00:24:54He is dying right now naked in a jacuzzi with a smelly vagrant then it looks like it's up to
00:25:00me
00:25:01The witch doctor only I know the right techniques to take her down
00:25:07My son's life is in your hands you heal him. I will give you whatever your heart desires. I
00:25:14Don't know who you are, but there is no way. I am letting you rip my golden bachelor away from
00:25:19me
00:25:21This isn't the finishing touch
00:25:25I must now give you the kiss of life
00:25:27So we can both survive
00:25:47It's poison gas
00:25:50Poison gas will smoke them out and end her torture over master Lysander
00:25:55Poison gas my son is in there. You're jeopardizing his life as well
00:26:00No, don't worry general gold diggers like her only care about themselves
00:26:05Soon she'll come out crying to mommy then we can reverse the poison on your son and then he can
00:26:11marry one of us
00:26:13They really won't stop until they get both of us killed
00:26:18I made a promise to you that I'd save you
00:26:21It's now or never
00:26:35What the hell are they doing in there it's been over 10 minutes wait a second
00:26:40You don't think that they're
00:26:42You you suffocated my brother and miss trixie in there. Don't point your fingers at me if your brother's dead
00:26:48It's because of that homeless gold digger. Oh my god. Yeah, she's the one who sealed the door shut
00:26:54I mean she probably locked themselves in there on accident
00:26:57Miss trixie wouldn't have to do that if you weren't trying to sabotage her from saving my brother. This is
00:27:03taking way too long
00:27:05Captain morales it's time to get out
00:27:07The big guns these bazookas can flatten even a bomb shelter
00:27:12The soup she won't be able to hide even if she's the devil himself crap. Oh my god get back
00:27:18suck
00:27:20Ready
00:27:21Hey, oh shit
00:27:27Quit your whining and stand down
00:27:42The parasites been extracted shooter dead now do I need to fix your hearing too? I said stand down
00:27:50Don't listen to her. She's a fraud a termite to the field of medicine
00:27:54I just saved this man that otherwise would have died in your care
00:27:58If I'm a termite then
00:28:00You're worse than a disease spreading tick wait a second
00:28:04Are you saying you cured my son? He'll wake in just a moment. You can see for yourself
00:28:09Well now you're just asking to be exposed. That is it. No more stalling general if you won't punish her
00:28:17I will
00:28:21Don't hurt her
00:28:27He's a killer
00:28:34He's a killer
00:28:34His pulse is regular in fact it's never been better
00:28:40There's no sign of illness infection or disease
00:28:51Miss Trixie did it dad
00:28:53Lysander's warm again. He's not cold and pale like before and his heart is strong. Come feel it
00:29:01I saved my son
00:29:03Thank you
00:29:04Next time don't go seeking medical advice from those with ill will
00:29:08Your son would have otherwise died by their greedy and unskilled hands
00:29:11I've learned my lesson
00:29:13I will not let these two nutjobs ever practice their voodoo voodoo magic again
00:29:18Wait, wait, no, no, there is only one person in the world
00:29:22Who is more skilled in the field of medicine than the queen angel and I
00:29:28The goddess healer
00:29:33Could you really be the goddess of healing but rumor has it that the goddess of healing is well over
00:29:39100 years old and
00:29:41You don't look a day after 20. It doesn't matter who I am
00:29:45What matters is that the patient is healthy again
00:29:48Devon, I've repaid your kindness by fulfilling your wish of saving your brother
00:29:52Take care
00:29:53No, wait
00:29:54Miss Trixie, we still haven't fulfilled our promise to you yet
00:29:57He's right
00:29:59We are men of our words and as I promised you my heir Lysander would take you as a wife
00:30:03if you cured him and you did just that
00:30:06Of course, you're welcome to marry me instead
00:30:10I really appreciate it, but I'm sorry
00:30:15I'm already engaged
00:30:19Already engaged?
00:30:20I am
00:30:21I've been patiently awaiting his return from deployment for the last three years
00:30:25And he's coming back today
00:30:27But don't be disappointed
00:30:29Really, I'm no one special
00:30:31I just got lucky with your brother
00:30:33Some guru taught me that spa water can cure all kinds of ailments
00:30:36But you're still Lysander's savior, please
00:30:39Let me give you what I promised take the gold
00:30:41No, really
00:30:44I don't need anything
00:30:46I just believe in doing good in the world
00:30:51Trixie, it's your fiance
00:30:53He's back and he says he's breaking up with you
00:30:59I must go
00:31:06Hobo close
00:31:07Halo glow
00:31:09I bet the goddess healer is just like miss Trixie
00:31:12It was just dumb luck
00:31:14She's even dumber for not accepting his marriage proposal
00:31:17She could have been the richest woman in the world
00:31:19Marrying the hottest most powerful bachelor around
00:31:25I'm gonna marry that homeless woman
00:31:32Oh my god
00:31:34I mean, I don't know about that homeless bimbo, but this is godly
00:31:39No, no, no, no, Lysander
00:31:41My third dog's not what's supposed to be mine
00:31:46I'd so much rather share him with you than let that penniless ugly bitch have him
00:31:50You two nut jobs are a disgrace to your profession
00:31:53Take these two weirdos out of here and revoke their licenses
00:31:57Wait, no
00:31:58We're not brides
00:31:59No, she's just better than us
00:32:02Oh my god
00:32:06We were truly blessed to have miss Trixie here, huh?
00:32:09She's no average Jane
00:32:10No, she isn't
00:32:11She said it was just dumb luck
00:32:13But if she truly had these special skills
00:32:16Why did she wear that shit-stained dress and had an impeccable looking doll?
00:32:19But think about the impenetrable walls
00:32:21No normal person could have done that
00:32:23Goddess or not
00:32:25Homeless or not, I don't care
00:32:27I have never met a woman like that
00:32:28I have to find her
00:32:29I have to make her my life
00:32:31She won my heart over too
00:32:32But if my bestest big bro wants her
00:32:35I'll help you find her
00:32:36All right, listen
00:32:38I need help finding three wedding gifts
00:32:45I'm dumping Trixie
00:32:46So I want you, your granddaughters, filthy things out of my house
00:32:52Now
00:32:53Trixie paid for this house
00:32:55She waited for you for three years
00:32:58She was dumb enough to put my name on the lease
00:33:00And I'm upgrading for a better girlfriend now
00:33:02One with some serious fuck you money
00:33:05So get lost
00:33:07Who gave you permission to bark like a rabbit hyena in my house?
00:33:16Grandma
00:33:18Beatrice, Trixie, Amore
00:33:21I've been dying to throw this in your face
00:33:23I'm dumping you for your best friend, Marissa
00:33:27In fact, the wedding's tomorrow
00:33:30So sign over the house now
00:33:37You gave me this ring and asked me to wait
00:33:40And I did
00:33:42For three years while you were deployed
00:33:44Yet you cheat on me with my best friend
00:33:46And now you're trying to swindle my home?
00:33:50Do you have no shame?
00:33:52We were together for three years and uh
00:33:54It was a complete waste of my life
00:33:55When I could have been with a loaded girl like Marissa
00:34:03That's how much you would owe me if I was in the rent-to-boyfriend business
00:34:09I see you're fulfilling your highest aspirations of being a low-grade male prostitute
00:34:18Oh, yeah?
00:34:19Well, Marissa
00:34:21Is so much better than you
00:34:23She grew up even poorer than you
00:34:26And now she's the CEO of an entire corporation
00:34:30And you?
00:34:35You're still nothing
00:34:37So you think she's an upgrade?
00:34:40Of course she's an upgrade
00:34:42Look what she uh got me for my engagement
00:34:46Oops
00:34:47Yeah
00:34:48That's maybe worth one millionth the presidential contract I gave her
00:34:58You gave her the presidential contract?
00:35:00I certainly did
00:35:01In fact, Marissa, you and your dimwit brother
00:35:06Only have everything you have all thanks to me
00:35:10Oh, I think she's losing it bro
00:35:15That breakup must have hit her hard
00:35:17You two are the ungrateful cheating scum here
00:35:21My granddaughter supported you and your entire family for three years while you were gone
00:35:28How dare you insult her?
00:35:31It's okay, Grandma
00:35:32Let's not stoop to that level
00:35:35Poor Edna
00:35:36She still doesn't know what you're doing out there on the streets, huh?
00:35:39What is he talking about, Jersey?
00:35:41Show her, Bob
00:35:47This is how embarrassingly useless your granddaughter is
00:35:50She didn't purchase this house on her own
00:35:52She was begging on the street for money
00:35:56I can't be caught with a piss poor nobody like you
00:35:59Even if you got no game, I got street cred I gotta keep, ya dig?
00:36:04The word you're looking for is dignity
00:36:07And you're one to speak, cheater
00:36:10Is this true, Trixie?
00:36:15I've been broadening my horizons, Grandma
00:36:18I want to see how regular everyday people live
00:36:21So that I can help them
00:36:23Of course, those without substance underneath would never understand that
00:36:27What is that supposed to mean?
00:36:29It means the new girlfriend you think is an upgrade
00:36:32Is actually a downgrade
00:36:37Enough bullshitting already
00:36:39Just sign the damn papers and we can each get on with our lives
00:36:54At your wedding, I will
00:36:57Whaaaaat?
00:36:58If you won't do good by me of breaking things off before two-timing me with my best friend
00:37:02Why should I do good by you?
00:37:05I'll give you my John Hancock at your wedding as a charity to you
00:37:10Fucking bitch!
00:37:12You better keep your word
00:37:13Oh, that's rich
00:37:15After tomorrow, you will never feel so rich ever again
00:37:18Do you remember that?
00:37:26Trixie, Marissa's a millionaire now
00:37:29They'll destroy you if you show even so much as a hair at their wedding
00:37:33Grandma, I have to confess something to you
00:37:36I've secretly amassed a fortune worth trillions
00:37:39Trillions?
00:37:43That would make you the richest person on the planet
00:37:47It's because of the healing hands I inherited from Asseplius
00:37:51The god of healing
00:37:53I've saved several world leaders with these hands
00:37:56That's how I was able to give Marissa the presidential contract
00:38:00And become the goddess healer
00:38:01It makes me angrier hearing her name knowing how she betrayed you
00:38:05But please, Trixie dear, I know it was to broken your heart
00:38:10But embellishing your worth and who you are
00:38:15It will only delay the healing process
00:38:17You don't have to believe me just yet
00:38:20After we lost mom and dad because we didn't have the money for their medical bills
00:38:24I vowed that I would do everything I can to serve those in need
00:38:29That's why I'm taking everything back from Butch and I'm giving it back to charity
00:38:33You've always had an angel's heart
00:38:35I'm certain you will meet someone who will treat you right
00:38:39Who actually deserves you
00:38:42You will see tomorrow, Grandma
00:38:45Oh yeah
00:38:50You said Trixie's crashing your wedding?
00:38:53She was bullying us too, Sasa
00:38:56She's probably trying to extort you now that she knows you're rich as fuck
00:39:00And hope when nobody steps on a snake
00:39:02Snake bites back hard
00:39:05So let her come and embarrass herself
00:39:07You mean
00:39:10We broadcast that video of me?
00:39:16Yes
00:39:16Her cavewoman's take the 19th century tin can
00:39:20She'll prop me up higher on my pedestal and the whole world sees her in her homeless mess
00:39:24Against my presidential glow up
00:39:27Let's turn this party into her funeral
00:39:36There he is
00:39:38Welcome home, brother
00:39:40Welcome home, General
00:39:44Sir, the homeless woman who saved you, Miss Trixie
00:39:47This is the file of her ex, Butch Tanner
00:39:49He served with your regiment in the Marines
00:39:51You mean the Butch Tanner that can barely carry supplies
00:39:54Well, she's been providing for him and his entire family while he's been deployed overseas, sir
00:39:58So she waited for him for years and then he betrayed her
00:40:01Fucking coward
00:40:02According to intel, she's planning to bring it down on them at their wedding
00:40:05Then we should join her
00:40:08Men, I'm only alive today because of that virtuous woman and her incredible power that saved my life
00:40:13So she needs our support
00:40:15Will you join me in protecting her?
00:40:16Yes, sir!
00:40:17We will allow our lives to protect her, sir!
00:40:20Well, let's roll
00:40:36Welcome, everyone, to my wedding
00:40:39Today is a very special day for me and Butch
00:40:41Not only are we getting married
00:40:42But in just one hour, my company will be receiving the presidential contract
00:40:46Allowing my biomedical company to go public
00:40:53Congratulations on the contract once again, Mrs.
00:40:55Wakeham, Stowe Butch is taking my last name
00:40:58Oh, and please don't be so uptight, Secretary Cho
00:41:02You are the secretary of the entire U.S. Health Department, but this is a par-tay after all
00:41:07I see some of the most important people in the nation have also arrived to celebrate you
00:41:14The U.S. President will also be arriving soon to give you the contract herself
00:41:19It's an honor
00:41:20And that's why Sasa is the best wife a man could ever dream of
00:41:25We will make sure the crowd is entertained tonight
00:41:28We'll let the wedding begin
00:41:32Not so fast
00:41:33The party doesn't start until I say it does
00:41:58You two really are a match made in hell
00:42:01So I've come to save your guests from this oncoming train wreck
00:42:04I don't recognize it from any of our elite circles
00:42:07Who is she?
00:42:08Uh, this is our entertainment for tonight, sir
00:42:11Just watch
00:42:15Trixie, what are you doing here?
00:42:16This isn't the homeless shelter you lost
00:42:18I bet she's here to bum a meal off us
00:42:21You know, being this poor
00:42:24Me, bum a meal
00:42:26Have you forgotten that it was I who bankrolled you two for the last three years?
00:42:30And what evidence do you have of that?
00:42:32Look at me, then go look at yourself in the mirror
00:42:34I'm a millionaire CEO
00:42:36Even the first woman president will be here any second now to congratulate me
00:42:41And you're nothing but a washed up sewer rat
00:42:44Sasa, she's like so obsessed with me
00:42:48See everyone?
00:42:50Butch already cut ties with his ex
00:42:52But she's so shameless and desperate that she'd still show up to my wedding to suck up to me
00:42:58This is what poor sad girls do
00:43:00They beg for scraps from us, the rich and glorious
00:43:04Projecting much, Marissa?
00:43:06You might feel all high and mighty now
00:43:08But don't bite the hand that feeds you
00:43:11Especially when I'm the one who's giving you the contract
00:43:19You giving me the contract?
00:43:21You have no skills, no education, no connection
00:43:25So how could you possibly have a pool to get the U.S. fucking president to give me a billion
00:43:31dollar contract?
00:43:32We both share humble beginnings, Marissa
00:43:34And I saw potential in you
00:43:36Even trusted you as my best friend
00:43:38But I recognize now that greed has poisoned you
00:43:41Don't be all sore now just because I stole your man
00:43:45This is what us rich girls do
00:43:47They steal from lame spinsters for fun
00:43:50Damn right
00:43:52You were too embarrassing for me
00:43:55Sasa tramples you any day
00:43:57I can say that now that I'm marrying the rich
00:44:00Bravo
00:44:01Self-admission of a gold digger
00:44:02Quick, somebody put that on a memoir
00:44:04Sasa, she's embarrassing me in front of everyone
00:44:06She'll make her stop
00:44:08Don't listen to her, everyone
00:44:09She's the gold-dicking, blood-sucking leech
00:44:12I don't even have to lift a finger and you're already embarrassing yourself in front of everyone for me, Butch
00:44:19You may look and sound like a man
00:44:21But you're nothing but a pathetic coward
00:44:23Okay, enough
00:44:24You know what I always couldn't stand about you?
00:44:26You're moral posturing
00:44:29But guess what?
00:44:30Morals are just lies to make you lame girls feel better about yourselves
00:44:33That's why no man will choose you over Marissa Trixie
00:44:37Because I've got the material goods
00:44:39You're just all empty talk
00:44:41I'm not here to request to be chosen
00:44:43Because I'm the one who's doing the choosing
00:44:47See this?
00:44:59Oh my god
00:45:01Is that the billion dollar contract for Sasa?
00:45:06The one that's supposed to make us all rich as fuck?
00:45:08No, absolutely not
00:45:10I don't believe it
00:45:12You all sound so scared already
00:45:14Don't worry
00:45:15This isn't that contract
00:45:17It's the lease to the modest home you try to swindle from me
00:45:23See everyone she's just trying to bluff us
00:45:26But you don't even have the guts to go all the way
00:45:28Look at her following orders
00:45:29I asked her to sign over the lease and here she is
00:45:32Like a good little peasant slave
00:45:35That house is worth all her life savings
00:45:41You want to uh, I don't know, beg for a little treat while you're at it?
00:45:54You misunderstand me
00:45:56I'm here to take back everything I've ever given you
00:45:59I'm giving it to charity
00:46:07Bro, she's gone cuckoo in the head
00:46:10She thinks that just because she rented a pretty little dress
00:46:13She can pretend to be a deep pocket and invest in baddie
00:46:15You wish you had that kind of money to just toss away Trixie
00:46:18It's just a drop in the bucket for me
00:46:20Uh, I know what this is
00:46:23You've gotten delusional
00:46:24And you think you're Cinderella so you can just show up to a fancy party
00:46:27And some Prince Charming will scoop you into money forever?
00:46:31Well that's not happening
00:46:32Security, lock the doors
00:46:34This woman doesn't leave until we're through with her
00:46:39This is where your dreams will die, bitch
00:46:45We found Miss Trixie Lysander
00:46:46She's being cornered by her ex and his mistress at the Wickham wedding right now
00:46:50Butch Tanner
00:46:51Well, he's gonna wish he died in battle after I'm done with him
00:46:54Let's go
00:46:59You think a few toy guns scare me, Marissa?
00:47:01I've saved plenty of people for much worse
00:47:05Including your head of command, Butch
00:47:08General Lysander Armstrong
00:47:10You mean the legendary war hero?
00:47:12He's been in a coma for years after he saved the nation from a terrorist attack
00:47:16You're an unskilled, unemployed, ugly leech
00:47:20So how could you possibly have this magical ability to heal someone like General Lysander Armstrong?
00:47:26No one here is gonna believe you
00:47:27Have you really cured the incurable General?
00:47:30Then Sasa is the fucking Virgin Mary
00:47:32And she's not
00:47:34You're just asking to be humiliated, Trixie
00:47:37Show them, Butch
00:47:43See for yourselves everyone
00:47:46Trixie's just a
00:47:47Reloading beggar
00:47:51She won't leave me and Marissa alone cause we're rich as fuck now
00:48:23I'm a major in the marines
00:48:26So let's go
00:48:26Maybe someone will drop a couple bucks in your tin can
00:48:35i already have everything one can dream of but i valued our friendship marissa which is why i
00:48:40came here to give you a second chance to see if you'd apologize and admit to your backstabbing
00:48:45but no you stooped so low it disgusts me nothing is more disgusting than you standing on street
00:48:53corners like a bum and who knows if you've already started offering sexual services
00:49:00well then why don't you get on your knees for me trixie my brother will never take you back
00:49:06no man will marry an embarrassment like you but make me happy and i might consider making
00:49:12you my personal prostitute
00:49:25how dare you hit my brother i'm never letting you leave here alive
00:49:32don't worry my dear after i'm done with you trixie not even the goddess of healing will be able to
00:49:38save you oh is that so security get down on your knees and give bob one hell of a blow
00:49:48job
00:49:48in front of everybody here or i'll pop so many holes in you the men here won't know which one
00:49:53to fuck
00:49:54i don't need to be the goddess of anything to punish you any of the powerful leaders i've saved before
00:49:59could crush you before you even touch me dream on you wish general lysander scooped you off your feet
00:50:07but you weren't good enough for me you're definitely not good enough for him enough
00:50:12you're souring my party so you either get the fuck out
00:50:16or i'm gonna shoot you on the count of three i think i quite like it here
00:50:21two
00:50:22two
00:50:34this wine is so delicious one shoot
00:50:40nobody is laying a hand on my future wife
00:51:01Who the hell is this?
00:51:06I'm sorry that I'm late.
00:51:07Did they hurt you?
00:51:09No, I'm fine.
00:51:11But, um, when did I become your future wife?
00:51:16You saved me, Trixie, remember?
00:51:19I'm a man of my word.
00:51:20They're never going to hurt you ever again.
00:51:22Really, it was nothing.
00:51:25I saved you because you're a good man,
00:51:27not because I want you to owe me any favors.
00:51:35I see what this is.
00:51:36You're the one who cheated on me, Trixie.
00:51:39Look at you guys all lovey-dove.
00:51:41Don't try to pin this on her.
00:51:42She waited for you for three years.
00:51:44This is the kind of woman of virtue that a man would die for.
00:51:49Virtue?
00:51:50Don't make me laugh.
00:51:52She's probably out there giving blowjobs for cash.
00:51:55No man who, in a hundred-foot pole, would want to touch her.
00:51:59She should be happy Bob was willing to give her some.
00:52:05I see her in the Marines.
00:52:09I'm a major.
00:52:10Look, man.
00:52:11I know Trixie is like a, I don't know, a seven.
00:52:14Now that she's all cleaned up,
00:52:16but don't waste your man on a whiny, worthless woman like that.
00:52:20Ow!
00:52:21Ow!
00:52:23Ow!
00:52:23Ah!
00:52:24Ah!
00:52:25A real man
00:52:26never talks about a woman that way.
00:52:30You're a coward.
00:52:40We don't need to fight fire with fire to deal with the likes of them.
00:52:44You're very gracious Trixie, you know that?
00:52:49You're only getting off of it because she's so kind,
00:52:51so you're going to do me the favor of never coming near her again.
00:52:54You understand?
00:52:54You want to fuck with me, you little dipshit?
00:52:56I'm a fucking major.
00:52:58You're probably lowest rank of the military grunts.
00:53:01I'll, I'll destroy you.
00:53:03Do you really not know who this is, Butch?
00:53:05I thought you were in the Marines.
00:53:07What have you been doing this whole time
00:53:08if you don't know who this war hero is?
00:53:11He was just a supply boy.
00:53:15War hero?
00:53:17Is this all part of your plan, Trixie?
00:53:20Poor girl.
00:53:21Did you sell your house to hire this actor
00:53:23so you can feel better about yourself?
00:53:25A woman's worth is tied to the man she marries.
00:53:28Trixie is worthless
00:53:29because that guy looks like a cowboy.
00:53:34A bum girl and a pimp.
00:53:36What a pair.
00:53:38Seems like they don't know who you are
00:53:40since you've been out of action for so long.
00:53:42Maybe we should try to pay some off some more, don't you think?
00:53:46Bring in the wedding gifts.
00:53:55What is all this?
00:53:57Trixie, listen.
00:53:58I know that you didn't ask for anything
00:53:59after you saved my life.
00:54:01But I know that we shared a moment.
00:54:06I'm not the kind of man
00:54:08to get close to a woman
00:54:09and then just disappear.
00:54:10It's not in my nature.
00:54:12I'm like somebody else here.
00:54:15Listen, Trixie,
00:54:16I have never met a woman
00:54:20like you.
00:54:22So incredible and kind and beautiful.
00:54:25So I know
00:54:26that you're the one for me.
00:54:29This guy's either nuts
00:54:31or a really,
00:54:32really good actor.
00:54:34Oscar worthy.
00:54:35Oscar worthy.
00:54:37No.
00:54:38First gift.
00:54:43Trixie, I know that you just lost your home.
00:54:46So I'm gifting you
00:54:47with your own new mansion.
00:54:50Worth $500 million.
00:54:52Previously owned by Jennifer Aniston.
00:54:55Second gift.
00:54:59This contains all the rights
00:55:01to my entire fortune,
00:55:03which is now yours.
00:55:05Entire fortune from a cowboy actor?
00:55:07It must be that easy.
00:55:09They already spent their entire life savings
00:55:10on this clown show.
00:55:11They've got nothing left.
00:55:13Lysander,
00:55:14I really don't care for any of it.
00:55:16Look, I know.
00:55:17I know that you are the farthest thing
00:55:19from a material woman.
00:55:20Okay?
00:55:21Which is exactly why
00:55:22my third gift
00:55:24is, um,
00:55:26well,
00:55:27I know that you're going to help.
00:55:42Cleo!
00:55:43Hey!
00:55:44Oh, my God.
00:55:47You found my dog.
00:55:51Trixie, I'm just a man.
00:55:53But with you,
00:55:54it's so much more.
00:55:56Trixie Amore.
00:56:00Will you marry me?
00:56:03You know I can't say no to this doggo.
00:56:09Yes,
00:56:10I will marry you.
00:56:27Go, go, power couple.
00:56:30Woo!
00:56:31Okay, stop.
00:56:33The only power couple here
00:56:34is Butch and I.
00:56:37Let's remind everyone
00:56:38how worthless Trixie is.
00:56:41No man
00:56:42in their right mind
00:56:43would marry
00:56:44that embarrassing
00:56:45sack of scraps.
00:56:46Hey.
00:56:47I don't care
00:56:48if she's homeless or not,
00:56:49but I'm making this woman
00:56:50my wife,
00:56:51which means that
00:56:52she will be treated as
00:56:53and cherished as
00:56:54the most precious woman
00:56:55on earth.
00:56:56Understand?
00:57:01You still don't realize
00:57:02that my brother
00:57:03is the most powerful man
00:57:05on earth.
00:57:05This is General
00:57:06Lysander Armstrong.
00:57:15As if
00:57:17like an almighty
00:57:18General Lysander Armstrong
00:57:19would propose
00:57:20to a homeless prostitute
00:57:22like Trixie.
00:57:22Yes,
00:57:23the Armstrong family
00:57:24basically controlled
00:57:25the global stock market.
00:57:26Lysander Armstrong
00:57:27would sooner marry
00:57:28the princess of England
00:57:29than someone from
00:57:30the lowest rank
00:57:31of society.
00:57:32I bet my life
00:57:33you're all just
00:57:34actors.
00:57:35Then you better
00:57:35enjoy your last breath.
00:57:37Come on, Lysander.
00:57:38What are we waiting for?
00:57:39Let's show them
00:57:39what we can do
00:57:39and get revenge
00:57:40for Trixie.
00:57:41What can a bunch
00:57:41of piss poor people
00:57:42do to us,
00:57:43the elites?
00:57:44Infect us with
00:57:45your poor people bad luck?
00:57:47She wishes
00:57:47she could blame
00:57:48her low status
00:57:49on bad luck.
00:57:50Truth is,
00:57:51she's just a useless,
00:57:52lazy bitchin' bum.
00:57:54She's utterly
00:57:55unmarried.
00:57:59I can dispose
00:58:00of them
00:58:00in other means
00:58:01if you don't
00:58:02prefer violence.
00:58:03I'd handle them
00:58:04myself,
00:58:05but
00:58:07I'll let you
00:58:07do all the
00:58:08heavy lifting.
00:58:09Go ahead,
00:58:10Lysander.
00:58:17Yes, hello,
00:58:18this is Lysander.
00:58:19Please
00:58:19bankrupt
00:58:20Marissa Wiccan
00:58:21for me.
00:58:23Oh my gosh,
00:58:24I'm so scared.
00:58:25Anyone
00:58:26these days
00:58:26could call
00:58:27anyone
00:58:27and pretend
00:58:27to be
00:58:28on the
00:58:28phone.
00:58:35Uh,
00:58:36hello?
00:58:36Yes.
00:58:39What?
00:58:44I'm a fake
00:58:46corrupt!
00:58:54Hey, hey, hey, hey.
00:58:56Are you sure
00:58:56that was the call,
00:58:57Sasa?
00:58:58That was a real call?
00:58:59People don't just
00:59:00suddenly go bankrupt
00:59:01like that.
00:59:01My company's dead.
00:59:03It's evaporated.
00:59:04It's in thin air.
00:59:08That's impossible.
00:59:10Who are you?
00:59:11What did you do?
00:59:13Secretary Cho,
00:59:14you said
00:59:15you're the
00:59:15Secretary of Health,
00:59:16right?
00:59:16And you yourself
00:59:17said that the
00:59:18Armstrong family
00:59:18owns the entire
00:59:19global stock market.
00:59:20Could that be
00:59:21how they
00:59:22bankrupted
00:59:22Miss Wickham?
00:59:24Then that means
00:59:26you're
00:59:27really Lysander
00:59:29Armstrong,
00:59:30the richest
00:59:30and most
00:59:31powerful man
00:59:32in the country.
00:59:33Trixie's
00:59:34Mary,
00:59:35the famed
00:59:35war hero,
00:59:37the man
00:59:37every girl
00:59:38wants
00:59:38and every
00:59:38man wants.
00:59:39to feed?
00:59:41Now you
00:59:42believe me?
00:59:43Those who do
00:59:43bad will always
00:59:44end up losing
00:59:45everything.
00:59:46There's got to
00:59:47be some trick
00:59:48to this.
00:59:48You guys are
00:59:49just bums
00:59:49trying to extort
00:59:50money from us.
00:59:52Sasa?
00:59:52Sasa?
00:59:53Sasa?
00:59:54Sasa?
00:59:59Sasa?
01:00:00I know
01:00:01why you're
01:00:01all over
01:00:02Trixie.
01:00:02Because you've
01:00:03been in the
01:00:03military for so
01:00:04long,
01:00:04you don't know
01:00:05what a real
01:00:05woman can do
01:00:06for you.
01:00:07Let me take
01:00:08you to my
01:00:08wedding chamber
01:00:09and I'll show
01:00:09you a good
01:00:10time.
01:00:13Do you
01:00:13have your
01:00:13hands for me
01:00:14or I'll have
01:00:15them removed
01:00:15for you.
01:00:20I would never
01:00:21be interested
01:00:22in a woman
01:00:22who's as
01:00:23vile and
01:00:24cruel and
01:00:25wicked as
01:00:26you are.
01:00:26Guess the
01:00:27cheater gets
01:00:27cheated on
01:00:28eventually.
01:00:31Sasa was
01:00:32just trying to
01:00:32save the
01:00:33company.
01:00:34I don't blame
01:00:35her at all.
01:00:35your double
01:00:36standards are
01:00:37incredible.
01:00:37Okay,
01:00:38you don't
01:00:38want me.
01:00:39Fine.
01:00:40But there's
01:00:40plenty of
01:00:41other
01:00:41efficiency.
01:00:42I can give
01:00:42you a room
01:00:43full of
01:00:44pageant winners
01:00:4418 years old.
01:00:46Rush for the
01:00:47taking.
01:00:54I did that
01:00:55so you
01:00:55wouldn't have
01:00:55to,
01:00:56Miss
01:00:56Trixine.
01:00:57Thank you,
01:00:57Devin.
01:00:59Marissa,
01:01:00not only have you
01:01:01backstabbed me,
01:01:03your best friend,
01:01:04by stealing my
01:01:05fiance,
01:01:06but now you'd
01:01:07sell out other
01:01:07innocent girls just
01:01:08to get your
01:01:09company back?
01:01:09You're an
01:01:10insult to all
01:01:11good women out
01:01:12there.
01:01:12No,
01:01:12to all of
01:01:13humanity.
01:01:14So now,
01:01:15everything that
01:01:15I've ever given
01:01:16you to,
01:01:17I'm taking it
01:01:18all back.
01:01:21Wait,
01:01:21everyone,
01:01:22stop.
01:01:25They're
01:01:25imposters.
01:01:30I just got
01:01:31off the phone
01:01:32with the
01:01:32president and
01:01:32she said your
01:01:33contract is not
01:01:34getting cancelled
01:01:34because it was
01:01:35assigned by the
01:01:36goddess healer
01:01:37herself.
01:01:37So we won't
01:01:39go bankrupt?
01:01:40The goddess healer?
01:01:41You mean the
01:01:42eccentric and
01:01:42highly elusive
01:01:43sage in the
01:01:44field of medicine
01:01:44approved of
01:01:45my biomedical
01:01:46products?
01:01:47Yes,
01:01:48that's the
01:01:48highest honor
01:01:49anyone can have
01:01:50in the field
01:01:50of health and
01:01:51medicine.
01:01:51The goddess
01:01:52healer's motto
01:01:53is the right
01:01:54rewrites the
01:01:55wrong,
01:01:56the left
01:01:56leave the
01:01:57wrong bereft.
01:01:58That means
01:01:59she's rewarding
01:02:00me.
01:02:00The president
01:02:01would never
01:02:02let your
01:02:02company go
01:02:03bankrupt.
01:02:04In fact,
01:02:05she's on
01:02:05her way now.
01:02:08So you're
01:02:08telling me
01:02:09this
01:02:10dashingly
01:02:10handsome
01:02:11motherfucker
01:02:11over here
01:02:12isn't
01:02:13Lysander
01:02:13Armstrong?
01:02:14Who the
01:02:14cares who
01:02:15he is?
01:02:16If the
01:02:16president and
01:02:17the goddess
01:02:17healer approves
01:02:18of my
01:02:18products,
01:02:19who cares
01:02:20about this
01:02:20washed up
01:02:20war hero?
01:02:21We can
01:02:21break his
01:02:22legs,
01:02:22break his
01:02:23arms,
01:02:23no one
01:02:23would even
01:02:23bat an
01:02:24eye.
01:02:24She even
01:02:25gave us
01:02:25explicit
01:02:26permission
01:02:26to call
01:02:27upon
01:02:27secret
01:02:27services.
01:02:28FBI!
01:02:30FBI!
01:02:31You're
01:02:32under arrest
01:02:32for fraudulent
01:02:33claims and
01:02:34identity theft.
01:02:36Gotcha.
01:02:41guess I
01:02:42still get
01:02:42the last
01:02:43laugh,
01:02:43Trixie.
01:02:44No,
01:02:44don't
01:02:44arrest
01:02:45her!
01:02:46Trixie
01:02:47is a
01:02:47good
01:02:47person.
01:02:48Please,
01:02:48officer,
01:02:49don't
01:02:49arrest
01:02:49her!
01:02:50Grandma,
01:02:51Mr. Rogers,
01:02:52Mrs. Williams,
01:02:53what are you
01:02:54all doing
01:02:54here?
01:02:54The
01:02:55neighbors
01:02:55heard about
01:02:55the
01:02:55breakup
01:02:56between
01:02:56you
01:02:56and
01:02:56Butch.
01:02:57We
01:02:57were
01:02:57worried,
01:02:58so we
01:02:59came here
01:02:59to back
01:02:59you
01:03:00up.
01:03:00Listen,
01:03:01officer,
01:03:02I can
01:03:02attest that
01:03:03Trixie
01:03:03Amoria is
01:03:04a good
01:03:04neighbor.
01:03:05She's
01:03:05very
01:03:05kind
01:03:06hearted
01:03:06and
01:03:06would
01:03:07never
01:03:07break
01:03:07the
01:03:08law.
01:03:08Yes,
01:03:08and
01:03:09one
01:03:09time
01:03:09when
01:03:09my
01:03:09daughter
01:03:10needed
01:03:10university
01:03:11tuition,
01:03:12Trixie
01:03:12gave her
01:03:12everything
01:03:13she had
01:03:14just to
01:03:14help her
01:03:14out.
01:03:15She
01:03:15also
01:03:15paid
01:03:16for
01:03:16my
01:03:16recent
01:03:16heart
01:03:17surgery
01:03:17as
01:03:17well.
01:03:18My
01:03:19fiance
01:03:19really
01:03:20is
01:03:20an
01:03:20incredible
01:03:20woman.
01:03:21She's
01:03:22an
01:03:22angel
01:03:22descended
01:03:23from
01:03:24heaven.
01:03:28You
01:03:29must
01:03:29be
01:03:29the
01:03:29criminal
01:03:30pretending
01:03:30to be
01:03:30General
01:03:31Lysander
01:03:31Armstrong.
01:03:32My
01:03:33brother
01:03:33is
01:03:33not
01:03:34a
01:03:34criminal.
01:03:34He's
01:03:35a
01:03:35war
01:03:35hero
01:03:35who
01:03:36single-handedly
01:03:36saved
01:03:37this
01:03:37country
01:03:37from
01:03:37a
01:03:37terrorist
01:03:38attack.
01:03:39Without
01:03:39him,
01:03:39this
01:03:39whole
01:03:39country
01:03:40would
01:03:40have
01:03:40been
01:03:40bombed
01:03:40to
01:03:41ash.
01:03:42And
01:03:42that's
01:03:42why
01:03:42it's
01:03:42twice
01:03:43the
01:03:43crime
01:03:43is
01:03:44stealing
01:03:44his
01:03:44identity.
01:03:45General
01:03:45Lysander
01:03:46Armstrong
01:03:46only fell
01:03:47into
01:03:47a
01:03:47coma
01:03:48because
01:03:48of
01:03:48the
01:03:48fight
01:03:48with
01:03:48the
01:03:49terrorist.
01:03:49And
01:03:49we've
01:03:54I
01:03:55can
01:03:55tell
01:03:55that
01:03:55this
01:03:55whole
01:03:55dilemma
01:03:56with
01:03:56my
01:03:56identity
01:03:56is
01:03:57causing
01:03:57you
01:03:57a
01:03:57lot
01:03:57of
01:03:57trouble.
01:03:58I
01:03:58promise
01:03:59I'll
01:03:59get it
01:03:59resolved
01:03:59and
01:04:00we
01:04:00can
01:04:00focus
01:04:00on
01:04:01taking
01:04:01down
01:04:01your
01:04:01scumbag
01:04:02ex.
01:04:04If you
01:04:05want to
01:04:05arrest
01:04:05me,
01:04:05fine.
01:04:07But
01:04:07don't
01:04:07fuck
01:04:08with
01:04:08my
01:04:08fiance.
01:04:09You
01:04:09don't
01:04:09get
01:04:09to
01:04:09decide
01:04:10punk.
01:04:10Let's
01:04:11go!
01:04:34get
01:04:34him!
01:04:35If
01:04:36you
01:04:36can.
01:04:59go!
01:05:27Is that enough pain?
01:05:28Or do you want more?
01:05:37Legend is written all over you, Icenander.
01:05:42Grandma.
01:05:44Meet my new fiancé.
01:05:48Wow, your new fiancé.
01:05:50He's so manly.
01:05:52Much better than your last one.
01:05:54I always knew you'd find someone better.
01:05:57It's Butch's loss.
01:05:59Trixie has always been so much better than Marissa.
01:06:02She's like a shining star in the sky,
01:06:04and Marissa's like a roach in the sewers.
01:06:07Bitch, we name-calling now?
01:06:09I'll drown you out with insults from my side, right, Sam?
01:06:12Drown out the poor!
01:06:13Drown out the poor!
01:06:15Drown out the poor!
01:06:16Drown out the poor!
01:06:18Drown out the poor!
01:06:19Drown out the poor!
01:06:21See, Trixie?
01:06:22You've got no connections,
01:06:23no power,
01:06:24you can't compete against me
01:06:26even if you have one guy on your side who can fight.
01:06:28We're too honorable to fight dirty like you.
01:06:30So you're using defenseless lives as your shield
01:06:33because you know we won't hurt them.
01:06:35Let them eat, Kate!
01:06:37Hmm.
01:06:46You can't shoot all of them.
01:06:48Grab what you can't, Bam.
01:06:49Attack!
01:07:07You will not hurt a single soul in my presence.
01:07:16What the fuck was that?
01:07:17I don't care what the fuck it was!
01:07:19I'm not letting her make a fool of me at my own wedding!
01:07:29Damn it!
01:07:30Damn it!
01:07:30Damn it!
01:07:32You forgot I had a gun, too?
01:07:35That'll teach you for messing with the Wickhams.
01:07:37Take Miss Trixie and her family and get out of here.
01:07:39We're quartered.
01:07:40I'll sacrifice myself to fend them off.
01:07:43Devin, you and your brother are both good men.
01:07:46I will not let your injury be in vain.
01:07:48They will be punished.
01:07:53Now hold still for me.
01:07:56Right.
01:07:57Rewrites the world.
01:08:09Holy fuck!
01:08:10Did she just reverse the bullet?
01:08:12By chanting the Goddess Healer's chant?
01:08:13Is she the Goddess Healer?
01:08:19I'm all better now.
01:08:20Thank you, Miss Trixie.
01:08:22See, I knew that you were no ordinary woman.
01:08:25No, please.
01:08:27I am just an ordinary girl.
01:08:29Don't put me on some sort of pedestal.
01:08:31Sure.
01:08:32You hear that?
01:08:33She's just some average homeless girl on the streets.
01:08:36She was probably holding out a super magnet that drew out the bullet.
01:08:39Well, I do not care for glory.
01:08:41I do believe in justice.
01:08:43Marissa and Butch, not only have you betrayed me, but now you've hurt the innocent too.
01:08:49I will make you both pay for your crimes.
01:08:51And who are you to judge me for what I do?
01:08:54God?
01:08:55Wrong.
01:08:57But you're close.
01:08:58I'm bullshit.
01:08:59I'm going to show you how the elite can travel on you little lives.
01:09:04You want to cross the line so bad?
01:09:06Then let's see you try.
01:09:08Charge!
01:09:17The hell is this?
01:09:19This is the line between life and death.
01:09:23Yo, was that extra neon spray paint?
01:09:26I'll admit it looks pretty good, but I'll die before I believe that's magic.
01:09:31You're not the Grim Reaper.
01:09:33What if it's a trap?
01:09:34That woman has many tricks up her sleeves.
01:09:36We ain't afraid of her.
01:09:37She's nothing but a circus prostitute.
01:09:40Why don't you cross the line and see for yourself?
01:09:43I will.
01:09:47Left leaves the wrong breath.
01:09:56I'm fine.
01:09:57Nothing happened.
01:09:59You'll see soon enough.
01:10:00Oh, please.
01:10:01I really want to die.
01:10:03And you call this the line between life and death?
01:10:05I knew you were just making that shit up.
01:10:08Whoops.
01:10:09Just frosted again.
01:10:10Whoops.
01:10:11And again.
01:10:12Nothing's happening.
01:10:19Swap.
01:10:20Swap.
01:10:21Swap.
01:10:23Swap.
01:10:24No!
01:10:25No, Pop.
01:10:26Hey.
01:10:28What did you do to my brother?
01:10:29I didn't do anything.
01:10:31Your brother just didn't want to heed my warning.
01:10:34I suggest you take him to the U.R.
01:10:36If you don't want your wedding to become his funeral.
01:10:39Come on.
01:10:41Major.
01:10:42Are you not going to help your own brother?
01:10:43How was he able to cross the line?
01:10:46See, this must be an illusion.
01:10:50Only the pure of heart can cross the line.
01:10:53Will somebody take my brother to the hospital, please?
01:11:02You're so sore I wouldn't marry you.
01:11:04You go and hurt my brother.
01:11:05Oh, please.
01:11:06You hurt us first.
01:11:08At first, I was really hurt by your betrayal.
01:11:11But I've come to realize your true colors are that of a snake and a coward.
01:11:15Marissa, thanks for taking this low life from me.
01:11:20You blame yourself for being worthless.
01:11:23You think anyone will want to marry you when you've got nothing to offer?
01:11:29When you wear odd and crazy clothes all day?
01:11:34Don't touch my wife.
01:11:38And instead, Trixie gets a handsome and protective husband.
01:11:43You can daydream all you want now, Trixie.
01:11:45But when the presidential contract arrives, it'll hit you like a fucking truck.
01:11:49That you're nothing but an ugly phony and I'm the queen of everything.
01:11:52Oh, really?
01:11:54Then let me show you how it is I who has everything you want.
01:11:58You've got nothing on me.
01:12:03Yes.
01:12:04Tell the president to get here immediately.
01:12:10Goddess.
01:12:11Madam President, I require your assistance.
01:12:15Yes, we'll be there immediately.
01:12:19Get the VP.
01:12:20We're leaving now.
01:12:24Did she just pretend to call the first woman president of the United States?
01:12:28God, I knew you were cheap, but I didn't know you were crazy, too.
01:12:31I'm so glad I dumped you for Marissa.
01:12:35You're pathetic, Trixie.
01:12:36As Secretary, to remind everyone how I have the presidential contract coming.
01:12:40Miss Wickham is correct.
01:12:41I was on the phone with the president earlier.
01:12:43Only the most important people have Madam President's direct line.
01:12:47You hear that, everyone?
01:12:48There is no way!
01:12:50Low-life Trixie could have called the president by herself.
01:12:54She's just a desperate phony who doesn't get enough male attention, so she's come here to play up her importance.
01:13:00No, my granddaughter would never do that.
01:13:04Reversing time just to heal someone's wound, only the goddess healer can do that.
01:13:08Is Trixie really the goddess healer?
01:13:11Oh!
01:13:12Oh!
01:13:17Oh!
01:13:19First, your boy toy actor pretends to be the war hero General Lysander Armstrong, and now
01:13:23you, Trixie, are pretending to be the goddess healer who gave me my presidential contract?
01:13:27Is this how the working class think all the time?
01:13:32I never realized how delusional they were.
01:13:35You can only dream of what you can never have, while we rub our riches and privilege in their faces.
01:13:41Look, I don't know what circus school you went to, but you trying to make me jealous, Trixie?
01:13:45It ain't working.
01:13:46You can't just fake the...
01:13:50Yeah, but goddess healing power is legendary.
01:13:53It's like real magic.
01:13:55Trixie, you're an angel, but the goddess healing is beyond your imagination.
01:14:00And if we steal her identity just to punish her ex, won't her followers be furious and riot against you?
01:14:08No.
01:14:09Trixie, look.
01:14:11I believe you.
01:14:13You saved me.
01:14:14Whether you're a goddess or not, you did that.
01:14:18No matter what happens, you are a goddess to me.
01:14:21We'll riot against you now.
01:14:23Tear her apart!
01:14:25Tear her apart!
01:14:26Tear her apart!
01:14:28Tear her apart!
01:14:30Tear her apart!
01:14:31The Vice President arrives!
01:14:48Who dare cause ruckus in here?
01:14:54You're General Lysander Armstrong.
01:14:56Wait, what?
01:14:59He's actually General Lysander Armstrong?
01:15:01No, no.
01:15:02We've been through this already once, okay?
01:15:05Right, Secretary Cho?
01:15:06This actor Trixie hired pulled this weird stunt to try to bankrupt me.
01:15:12But you already confirmed with Madame President that I got the contract coming still, right?
01:15:16Yes.
01:15:16We all thought he was a fraud.
01:15:18What I mean is, you're the war hero, General Lysander Armstrong.
01:15:25And how dare you crash Miss Wickham's wedding?
01:15:27The moment you wake up, you fall under this vixen spell?
01:15:31And now you're attacking one of the most important allies to the President?
01:15:35So he is the General.
01:15:38Oh, but he's in trouble now.
01:15:40Did you hear that?
01:15:41Even the Vice President knows me as an important ally to the nation's leader.
01:15:45So what if Trixie picked up some washed-up war hero?
01:15:48We got the VP and the President.
01:15:51On our side, you'll always be nothing, Trixie.
01:15:55I told you.
01:15:57Now punish them, Vice President Langley.
01:15:59This is treason!
01:16:00Lysander Armstrong, you are stripped from your military honors.
01:16:04And titles.
01:16:08Hurry!
01:16:09The Goddess Healer needs us.
01:16:13You can't do that, Mr. Vice President.
01:16:15My brother is a war hero.
01:16:17He single-handedly saved this country from terrorist attack.
01:16:20He was in a coma for two years.
01:16:22If it wasn't for Miss Trixie, he would...
01:16:23Enough!
01:16:24You speak another word and I will bring down your entire family.
01:16:28Not just your brother.
01:16:30Yeah.
01:16:31It's okay.
01:16:33Mr. Vice President, I've already given my life once for my country.
01:16:36I have no problem doing that again if it means protecting my fiancé's life.
01:16:41And let's be honest about one other thing, Mr. Vice President.
01:16:43I never gave a fuck about any damn titles.
01:16:49I truly saved a good man.
01:16:56I will not let you bring ruin to my fiancé.
01:16:59And what can you do about it?
01:17:01Oh, Mr. Vice President, I have a swell idea.
01:17:04My biomedical company invented the latest line of poison darts for the military.
01:17:09Let's try it out on them.
01:17:12Hold on, Mr. Vice President.
01:17:14There's no way that you're taking this seriously.
01:17:15Put innocent civilian lives in danger?
01:17:18Despicable!
01:17:19What's more despicable is that you and your filthy companions are disrespecting power.
01:17:25Miss Wickham, you can use full force on them.
01:17:28Did you hear that, boys?
01:17:43Wait, that's the president.
01:17:57Hey, idiots!
01:18:06Oh, my gosh!
01:18:07I'm so sorry, Madam President.
01:18:09That was...
01:18:10They were totally aiming for Trixie, the fraud in the middle.
01:18:14What is this?
01:18:16Oh, that's my new biomedical weapon, Madam, for your military.
01:18:19This is a war crime.
01:18:21These are innocent civilian lives you're messing with.
01:18:23You're the uncivilized buffoon.
01:18:25I can shoot whoever I want.
01:18:26I have the presidential contract.
01:18:28With great power comes great responsibility.
01:18:30And this is the kind of dastardly creation you've made with the contract I gave you?
01:18:35What are you doing?
01:18:36Reverse the poison.
01:18:36And take it out of the present before it's too late.
01:18:39That is easy.
01:18:41There's no need.
01:18:43I'll save everyone.
01:18:57It's raining gold!
01:19:01What's happening?
01:19:02Trixie doesn't have that kind of money.
01:19:04It's got to be cheap glitter.
01:19:08She...
01:19:08She...
01:19:09She...
01:19:09She is...
01:19:10She is a criminal.
01:19:12Don't worry, Madam President.
01:19:13We will arrest her and we'll throw her in prison.
01:19:15I'd be quiet if I were you.
01:19:17Because you're the one that would be going to prison once everyone is healed up.
01:19:20What are you talking about?
01:19:22The President literally came here to give me my billion dollar contract.
01:19:34This contract?
01:19:36Yeah!
01:19:37Yes!
01:19:38Thank you, first gentleman.
01:19:57My contract, you bitch!
01:19:59And that's not all.
01:20:12This foul weapon will not see the light of day.
01:20:15There is only a need for a vaccine if there is a virus.
01:20:18Don't you realize?
01:20:20Or are you too much of a goody two-shoes to understand that?
01:20:23You're the real virus here, Marissa.
01:20:26Money is worth more to you than human lives.
01:20:28And that's something I cannot tolerate.
01:20:31So prepare yourself.
01:20:32Because I'm about to smite you.
01:20:36What are you going to do?
01:20:37The President is here and I just invented the best biomedical products in the world.
01:20:44You'll pardon me for that little mishap, right?
01:20:47Madam President, you've recovered now.
01:20:50So what's your final decision?
01:20:54I'll...
01:20:54I'll...
01:20:55She's going to give me my billion dollar...
01:21:02I'll smack her until she sees 50 stars.
01:21:08Why?
01:21:09Why are you attacking me, Madam President?
01:21:12You're supposed to be giving me the billion dollar contract.
01:21:14You wish, you idiot!
01:21:18I've never seen a woman so vile, so ugly on the inside, it makes me want to vomit.
01:21:24I don't understand.
01:21:25I was just trying to punish these imposters for posing as the goddess of healing.
01:21:31And do you know the goddess healer saved me and my son during childbirth?
01:21:36You've really seen the goddess healer herself in the flesh?
01:21:41The one and only.
01:21:44And it's...
01:21:46Her.
01:21:48Oh!
01:21:48My God.
01:21:56Her.
01:21:57What?
01:21:59What?!
01:22:03Welcome, goddess.
01:22:11Uh, we, uh...
01:22:16You really are the goddess of healing, aren't you?
01:22:18How else did you think I saved you?
01:22:21Then why did you keep it a secret for so long?
01:22:25I wanted to walk the earth as a normal person.
01:22:28To help those in need.
01:22:30Then make sure the man I chose loved me for me.
01:22:34No, so that means the billion-dollar contract, it was you who gave it to me?
01:22:39Then she took it away just like that.
01:22:43That was her golden ticket.
01:22:44You were once my fiancé and best friend.
01:22:47But after everything you've done, we're officially getting ties with you both.
01:22:51No, please, I swear.
01:22:53I didn't know you were an ex-wife.
01:22:54Sit down.
01:22:57It doesn't matter who she is.
01:22:59Trixie has a heart of gold.
01:23:01She's an amazing person.
01:23:02And you ruined that the moment that you betrayed her.
01:23:06She's gonna be my wife.
01:23:07Because she is the most beautiful and amazing woman on this planet.
01:23:16I love you.
01:23:30All her gold.
01:23:31All her clothes.
01:23:33All that could have been mine.
01:23:35This is all your fault.
01:23:37This is all.
01:23:37You seduce me!
01:23:39Don't help me!
01:23:41You were the one that came on to me, you himbo!
01:23:44Please, Trixie, give me another chance!
01:23:48I want to be rich again!
01:23:50I'll be your slave.
01:23:51Kiss the ground you walk on!
01:23:53You've had your chance to apologize.
01:23:55But it's too late now.
01:23:57All I see is your greed and how much you'd hurt others just to benefit yourself.
01:24:02You two should be locked up.
01:24:03And she shall.
01:24:05For creating illegal weapons of mass destruction, arrest Marissa and Butch Wickham.
01:24:11It's all your fault, Marissa.
01:24:13I never loved you.
01:24:15It's your fault!
01:24:15I was only with your damn money.
01:24:17I can't.
01:24:18You were rich.
01:24:19You're all sinned self-help.
01:24:22Rest assured, goddess.
01:24:24We will not be using these biomedical weapons.
01:24:27My platform is spreading kindness, just like you.
01:24:31I knew you'd uphold our shared values.
01:24:33That is why I saved you.
01:24:35With these healing hands, I will work tirelessly to change the world one good deed at a time.
01:24:42Well, let's not let this wedding go to waste.
01:24:47Let's party!
01:24:49Wait, what if we just got married?
01:24:51Right now?
01:24:52Yes!
01:24:57Do you take each other to be your lawfully wedded partner?
01:25:01I do!
01:25:02I do!
01:25:03You may kiss the bride.
01:25:11I'll see you next time.
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